Parable of the Dream

Although I often ask for God to use dreams to speak to me, I rarely receive this type of insightful answer to prayer. When I do, they often come as parables and must be prayed over and thought through before the meaning becomes clear.

This week, I had such a dream. My dream gave voice to a fear I did not consciously realize I had, gave me peace in God’s assurance that all will be well, and even mirrored the Parable of the Sower.

This past Sunday, my pastor made public my call to full-time ministry, after which, I informed my sister and the entire Facebook world. It is more real now. It has been verbalized and approved by the church board, and both church family and biological family have given me their blessing. Many even admitted they were not surprised.

Days later, another pastor, mentor, and friend told me what the next steps were and gave me a warning to pray like I have never prayed before, to seek God as I have never sought Him before, and advised me to begin seeking which direction my ministry path may take. He, too, encouraged me and reminded me of how many people are here for me.

With each passing day, my anxiety level increased until it manifested in physical form – headaches, chest pain, and jaw pain. I even began to wonder if it was anxiety or if I was showing signs of a heart attack.

However, I did not know the cause for the building anxiety. I felt confident and assured of my call and was not consciously stressing over it. Nor did I feel stressed about the future, knowing God would lead me in time. Nor was I even stressing over my income woes. I felt assured that all was in God’s hands and all would be well.

This week, I also volunteered with VBS. Before the beginning of events one evening, I sought out the pastor to discuss this anxiety. He talked with me and the only change that I could even fathom causing it was my recent decision and subsequent announcement. Without time to discuss things in greater detail, I thanked him for listening to me and went about the business of VBS, soon forgetting my anxiety.

That same night, I had a markedly vivid and powerful dream which consumed my thoughts for several days. The meaning was quick to come. After all, even in the dream, right at the tail end, God spoke to the me-character in the dream, calling me to be a leader and telling me that, no matter what happened, we would win.

It was the details which begged for interpretation. As I started piecing the details together, the Parable of the Sower flashed in my mind like a neon OPEN sign flashing bright in the dead of night. In an instant, the dream and the parable overlaid, one upon the other, making the dream, and the parable, make perfect sense. Even better, the message was not a message just for me, but could be for any Christian living in this topsy turvy world of terrorism, violence, division, and political chaos.  

In the dream, I visited a place I once loved and hold dear to my heart, a place where I learned and grew, a place where I excelled and made close friends, a place I often equated with almost heaven on earth. After a long absence, the place had grown and flourished. New buildings sprang up all around. New technologies made this place a community within itself. It was the most advanced, most prestigious, most gorgeous place on the face of the earth. Its spiraling central tower rose high into the air, high above the surrounding landscape.

My first impression was utter awe and pride. I had something to do, even in small part, with the history of this place. I am a part of this grand design.

My first stop was to a bright and airy place at the very pinnacle of the sphere. It was a crowded place, but felt roomy. Everyone there was happy and laughing. The noise was sweet, and although loud, it did not hurt my ears or make it hard to hear those I conversed with.

I noticed everyone there was dressed in bright, light colors, and they were all much older than I. They had not a care in the world. I asked about the rest of the campus and the work of the students. No one cared. They were simply enjoying life as they knew it. They assumed they knew the truth, but did little to investigate. As long as their lively little worlds remained pleasant, nothing else mattered to them.

I looked down the hill and saw a place which seemed darker and less populated. I left the merriment of the retired adults to investigate this other scene. I entered a drab and deserted cowboy bar. People my own age, people I knew well, tended the bar. I asked them the same questions I asked the old-timers. They, however, knew something dark and sinister lurked below the surface. They believed the truth was out there, but they knew the dangers of seeking the truth. They warned me that it was best to not ask questions and to keep to themselves. As long as they didn’t rouse suspicions, they would remain safe.

As I talked with one of my elusive friends, I looked over his shoulder and saw a narrow road leading further downhill. Curious as to what was down there, I said my goodbyes and jogged on down the road. As I entered a dark alley, the road narrowed still further. I jogged past drab cement walls separated by open rusty cell doors. After I jogged to the end of the lane, I heard whispers behind me. I turned around and saw shadows backing up into the safety of the enclosure and heard scared voices whispering to keep still and quiet.

I turned around and jogged back up to my friends. I asked them about these shadows. In explanation, my friend took me outside. He pointed at a large screen towering above all the buildings. Just then, a chime sounded and people robotically exited buildings and stared up at the screen. After the message, those same people turned and walked away, leaving us alone in the open lane.

My friend explained that, no matter how many times a person had heard this message before, it was mandatory that every single person come out at this time every day and listen to the message again as a reminder of the strict rules one must follow in order to live safely and securely in this paradise.

When I laughed at the absurdity of all of this and told him it was like they were living in the Hunger Games or Divergent movies, he gave me a serious look to be quiet. He told me that I was a visitor and could leave and suggested I do just that. He warned that if I stayed too long, I would be stuck just like they were, unable to ever leave again.

He told me that those down the lane are the ones who knew the truth was out there, and they sought the truth, but they were caught and were now outcasts. They were too afraid to continue seeking the truth, but were also too afraid or unwilling to come back to society and live by the rules.

This whole scene baffled and angered me. I HAD to know the truth, even at the risk of getting stuck and not being able to leave.

I left my friend once again and jogged back down the narrow lane. I jogged past the outcast village and kept on jogging. Before I knew it, I was being chased by angry militant men in a giant black flying tank. The tank and the security soldiers were all shooting at me. At first, I was surprised that the man in charge of this militant group of security guards was an old friend and former boss. Then, I realized he, like so many others, was simply following orders. He was not ordered to kill me, but kill me he would if that was the only way he could stop me.

As I ran, I noticed everything around me turning red. I realized that I was standing in the blood of the martyrs, others who had come before me seeking the truth at all costs and losing their lives in consequence.

The next time I turned back around, I saw that my friends from the cowboy bar and a few from the outcast village were now following me. They were carrying wooden spears and arrows, weapons that would never come close to beating the enemy’s machine.

It was at this point that fear set in for the first time. I was not afraid when I ran into the outcast village. I was not afraid when I realized I was being pursued and shot at. I was not even afraid when I realized I was running through a field of blood.

The only thing that scared me was that people—those who only moments ago where too afraid to fight—were now running and fighting with me. They were following me. And because they were following me, some, if not all, would certainly lose their own lives in the field of the martyrs.

The voice of God called out to me. He said, “I am calling you to be a leader. I know you are scared. It is okay to be afraid, but I want you to know that it will be okay. No matter what happens, we will win.”

With this promise, I woke up.

 

At first, I was afraid God was calling me to be a missionary in some scary place and possibly become a martyr for Him.

Then, after prayer and seeing my dream through the lens of the Parable of the Sower, I realized He was simply calling me to step up and boldly chase after the truth. It goes back to the fear I had when the woman told me she saw Jesus in me. Being a spiritual leader is scary. What if I mess up? What if I lead people astray?

If I step up and become the leader He is calling me to be, others will follow me. Even now, others are following me. As long as I continually seek Him, seek His truth, I will not lead them astray.

Some of us may die as martyrs. Some of us may lose friends and family who cannot understand the choices we make. We may have to face tough decisions or scary life changes. Still, He promised that no matter what, in the end, we will win.

At first, I thought the dream was for me, a confirmation of His call on my life into full-time ministry. Maybe it was, but I think it was so much more than that. All of us who call ourselves Christians need to step up and lead. Others are hungry and ready to go, but they don’t know where to go or how to start. We must be bold and be willing to lead them to the truth.

 

Father, I pray that no matter what may come, I never stray from seeking the TRUTH.

Matthew 13: 18-23

¹⁸ “Listen then to what the parable of the sower means: ¹⁹ When anyone hears the message about the kingdom and does not understand it, the evil one comes and snatches away what was sown in their heart. This is the seed sown along the path. (the retirement community) ²⁰ The seed falling on rocky ground refers to someone who hears the word and at once receives it with joy. ²¹ But since they have no root, they last only a short time. When trouble or persecution comes because of the word, they quickly fall away. (the outcast community) ²² The seed falling among the thorns refers to someone who hears the word, but the worries of this life and the deceitfulness of wealth choke the word, making it unfruitful. (the cowboy bar) ²³ But the seed falling on good soil refers to someone who hears the word and understands it. This is the one who produces a crop, yielding a hundred, sixty or thirty times what was sown (the me-character).”

Which path will you choose?

from the Hunger Games movie . . . a turning point for Katniss, the reluctant leader.